- I do not need a reason. I am in my 20's. In college... I still have my youth and my health and I'm surrounded by people I can really tolerate. Why would I need any other fucking reason to celebrate?
- It's not Friday. Thank fucking Christ. (sorry Jesus!)
- Due to some rousing excitement on the comment section recently, my total view-count has skyrocketed! IT'S GREAT! Although, I will keep begging you all... If you wanna pick a bone with me, then great. Just do it on WSO, it's the only way I can get famous. There is a fucking post on Wolrd of Warcraft, and nothing about me. Shameful.
- It's.... SAINT PATRICK'S DAY!
That's right! My favorite holiday! Black? Asian? Croatian? Well... You're mother-fucking Irish today. I use this amazing holiday to excuse 24 hours of binge drinking because of my 'heritage.' What has my culture taught me? Well... There was a famine, Guinness, spousal abuse, and alcoholism. And that I should wear green, demand kisses from strangers, and get outrageously drunk All. Damn. Day. Warning: I may slip into what I think is an "Irish accent" at any point in the day... I will just end up sounding like an Indian, though.
Along similar lines, I received a reader email requesting that I rag on: the '11s for being so lazy and giving up because all they do is pre-game the bar and there, like, isn't even a bar culture at Williams! Well, I will do no such thing. I enjoy the hell out of the class of '11, and of course they pregame the bar... Why pay seven bucks a drink when you can just rip Popoff in your kitchen before standing awkwardly close to people you kind-of- but-not-really know in a hot, noisy, smelly, and extremely lit room?
But I have been pretty underwhelmed with the acceptance of day drinking here, along with the taboo of partying on nights that aren't Friday or Saturday. Sorry, if it ends in "day," that's good enough for me. Like, we're a fucking college for god's sake! I feel like none of you have seen Old School, and it breaks my heart. So, I demand that everyone gets belligerent tomorrow. If you have a midterm tomorrow, just take a couple shots of Jameson. Plus, it feels so much warmer when you're drunk. I know of several things happening around campus: a capella shows, Dodd stuff, something at Meadow (if there wasn't before... there will be now), plus like actual fun stuff at the bars, me in the basement of some empty building playing beruit until 4 in the morning then falling asleep in a bush on the way home, or you could host your own party! Either way- I'll be THIS close to disowning you all if I see more than 30% of campus sober by 3 PM. Please do me proud.
Anyway, this is the only post I have for you since I'm pretty fucked up already and am impressed I've made it this far. I hope I don't wake up tomorrow and re-read this post and realize I was speaking Spanish for half of it, and elfish for the other. God damn it, that would be really embarrassing.
Blah, blah, blah. Drink.
pAndoar!!!!1 OMG lol
Let's see if maybe we could be less cerebral in the comments (wanna argue about first amendment rights and god-complexes? go to WSO! srsly). In honor of the best day of the year, post your favorite drinking game/thing to do when drunk/drink/drinking story, etc. you get it. Just give it a shot, people. (See what I did there?)
drink every time you're fucking proud to be IRISH bitches. nothing beats st patty's day. NOTHING.
ReplyDeletealso drink whenever there's glitter. started as a movie drinking game with my friends, has expanded beautifully to all areas of life.
cell phone roulette. Everyone takes someone else's phone, types WHATEVER message they want, and address it to someone in the phone owner's address book. Then, you get your own phone back, and you have to either drink, or send the text.
ReplyDeletewarning: ex-boyfriend's current girlfriend might be a new mortal enemy after this game.
it sounds like no big deal, but after 7 shots of tequilla, you'll be sending "I love dick!" to Mom without a second thought.
O shit you speak elfish
ReplyDeleteFunny
ReplyDelete^Original!^
ReplyDelete1 drink for every sober person you see judging you for drinking in daylight
ReplyDeleteHey guys, no one put this on WSO just to irritate her into posting more.
ReplyDeletefunny
ReplyDeleteReally excited to belatedly read what you have in store for us this year on my beloved namesake's Saint day. Unfortunately I won't be in Billsville to run round campus hollering "PANDORA AMOR!" For all intents & purposes, I'll be in Ireland (read: pubs in the US of A like Mulconry's Donnelly's Caverly's Sheridan's etc etc). What does this matter? Naught a lick! Just wanted to say hi--I enjoy the shit out of your blog. Not a 'Liams student, but am a serial visiter, having me a hermano in your midst. Sure you've seen me. I'm the affectionate whirling loud pugnacious kissy drunk some call beauty incarnate others call potch. Anywho--picked up your twitter feed. Too soon to say love? Hope not.
ReplyDeleteLove,
potch